Tuesday, July 6, 2010

Yo DJ. Have mercy on my ears!


Now that I'm a working man with a 30-45 minute commute, I have joined the ranks of the talk radio faithful. For me, it generally goes sports in the morning, news/opinion on the way home. This particular post will focus on the morning sports, and what I consider to be the worst sports radio program in the world. I'm an amateur, but if there is worse, I'll eat my frikkin shoes after a mile run on a hot summer day. So congratulations Stephen A. Smith, yours is no longer the most annoying/irritable/unintelligent voice penetrating the cool morning airwaves. You've been relieved. Step down and make room for the new kings.

Yeah. That's you DJ. And you PK. Because of you I would rather listen to 30 minutes of static. Because of you I was forced to listen to Bob Lonsberry for an entire week (who was recently fired, btw). The phrase "DJ and PK in the morning" gives me an immediate gag reflex. They touch on sports maybe, and I stress MAYBE, like once every 20 minutes.

Seriously, these guys are bad. Remember when you were in 2nd grade and you teased and made fun of the cute girl you had a crush on. Well that's all their alleged "morning sports show" is. DJ teasing PK and vice versa. Problem is, they're both grown men. But that doesn't stop them. I'm not implying anything about their respective batting stances, I'm just calling it like I see it.

Now let's back up a sec. Who are these men? Well let me answer a question with a few questions. Would you rather watch a Jazz pregame/halftime/postgame show on FSN, or shoot yourself in the face with a tranquilizer? If you were ever held hostage, gagged, tied up, held at gunpoint and forced to watch this show, do you remember the short man with a squeaky voice who sits in front of a laptop while "moderating" the ramblings of Big T "former Jazzman turned Mormon Christmas album vocalist" Bailey and Pace "who the heck am I and why do I deserve to be in this seat" Mannion? Yes Ladies and Gents, that's DJ. As for PK. I have no idea who he is, and frankly, I don't care. He could have a microphone in Lebron James' pocket right now and I wouldn't listen to a word.

So I'm gonna end this pointless post with some honesty. This is all bitterness. I would love their jobs, and it just hurts that they are so bad at them. They claim the "highest rated sports show in Utah," which is a SERIOUS problem. Either someone goes to jail for false advertising, or a large number of idiot men need to be stripped of their man cards and taught how to change the station. I mean COME ON.

4 comments :

sarah jane said...

hahaha! we both very much like this rant -jacob and sarah

Laur and Jeff said...

hahahaha. Buzzy you're funny!
Maybe you should call into the show and tell them how you really feel...I'd tune in to then.

EssayEm said...

"if it walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck... it ain't a mongoose." - stephen a. smith.

you can't hate on the man who played at a div. II college and claims at his age, he could still be more of a contributing nba player than some of the guys on nba benchs. haha, love it bryce! it's about time buzzcb85 returned to the internet!

April and Paul Monroe said...

haha oh i love you jess! And yes, next time I come up I'll give you a call =)